Sweet Surrender

I want to follow up my last blog with a quick blip...  mostly because I want you all to know I am still breathing, haven't devised a grand scheme to escape to a new life with an assumed identity,  and have not signed the papers on my new padded cell. Yet. ;) I also want you to know that I truly appreciate all the love and support you send my way- seriously I am one lucky girl to know so many great people.

Every night at bedtime the kids and I name one thing that we are thankful for.  Last night, Kiera, without any prompting or knowledge of the mental mess I have been said, "I am thankful that tomorrow is a new day."

BAM! She sure knows how to smack a mom upside the head! I needed to hear it.  Such a simple thing to be thankful for, but such a BIG concept for an almost five year old little girl.  A concept so big, even her grown mother couldn't grasp it until it spilled out of the mouth of a child. Kiera gets it... she understands that every day we get a new chance, a new experience, and more time to enjoy life.  Come on, Mom.. get with the program!

So, I'm going to take her cue and do my best to move past my current funk and take it one NEW DAY at a time.  I was taking too many days in at once and needed to take it out of my head and onto paper.  I was taking in the past, present, and future all at once- it can really make a mess of a person! Yes, things are a mess, they have been for almost six years... that's nothing new. Yes, I will get really mad and really frustrated with life sometimes. But, we've made it this far- through so much more than I ever could have imagined. This path hasn't been easy that's for sure and it's not going to get easier real soon, but every day we get a new chance to try again and make things better.  I've got some real BIG help now, too. I've got three little voices that are so quick to remind me of the things I've taught them, so I don't forget and lose my way. Now, even if that beautiful mountain lake is covered in fog- I have these darling little people to make even the ugliest swamp sparkle. God Bless Them!